It is time for another wonderful guest post in the “Just Don’t Say It” series! If you’ll remember, one of my best friends wrote a post about the things you should avoid saying to people who are discerning religious vocations. As she continues her journey towards sisterhood (and awesomeness, as I like to say!), Katie decided to write a follow up post to her first one. I think you’ll enjoy her humor and wit in her follow up post! Continue to pray for Katie as she eagerly awaits her entrance to the Sisters of Mary!
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You’re too pretty to be a sister.
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There are so many things wrong with this statement, but I’m only going to point out the two most blatant assumptions.
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You are assuming that pretty women couldn’t possibly have a religious vocation and that they just need to find a good man (see Part 1) to procreate with.
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You are assuming that the only women who do have a religious vocation are the women who aren’t “good looking” enough to snag a man.
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Think about what you just said and if you still don’t get…well…good luck in life.
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So that means you can spend the next year getting drunk and having sex to get it out of your system, right?
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This was said to me recently when I told someone that if I get accepted I can’t enter until the end of August 2014.
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Let’s think about this. I just told you that I am planning on becoming a religious sister and you think I want to lose my morals for a year “to get it out of my system”, “just because I can” and that “they
don’t need to know.” Everyone knows that a relationship that starts out on a foundation of deceit lasts forever, said no one EVER.
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You should experience more of life before you decide something like that.
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Apparently never having sex somehow made me incredibly inexperienced in “living life.”
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Let’s see…I only have two undergraduate degrees and am currently in grad school; I’ve traveled abroad/visited 8 countries and have lived on my own for several years. I’ve experienced the party lifestyle, lived paycheck to paycheck and worked multiple jobs simultaneously to make ends meet, dated men who turned out to be crazy, and have lost friends because of the toxicity of their “friendship”. But yes, feel free to color me inexperienced in living life because I’m a virgin.
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You aren’t leaving for a year? That gives me a year to change your mind! Will you go out with me?
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SERIOUSLY?! Someone I’ve known since high school, and has liked me for just as long, not only had this thought process but actually VOICED it as well….on several occasions. Would you say that to me if I was weeks, or even DAYS from entering?
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I get it. Some people don’t know how to react so they make a joke or figure they can tell you how they feel with no commitment behind it because they already know what the answer is going to be.
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Say I “found a good man” and got engaged. Would you be asking me to marry you when I was only months, weeks, or days away from getting married?! Just because I’m not engaged in the traditional says doesn’t make these questions any less CREEPY.
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Are you sure you’re cut out for that kind of life?
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EXCUSE ME?! If you want to say you can’t see me as a sister, don’t beat around the bush. Man up and SAY IT. What is it about me exactly that makes you think I’m not cut out for “that kind of life?” My sense of adventure? My love for kids? My “potential”? Guess what, its BECAUSE of all those things that I am cut out for that kind of life.
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It never ceases to amaze me how often people just assume that you woke up one day thinking, “Oh hey, I think I am going to be a sister” and that you didn’t put any thought or prayer into what that could possibly mean. Trust, hours upon hours of research and prayer and tears goes into a decision like this.
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The Sisters of Mary are an incredible community and I am honored to have the privilege of just applying to their order. The process of becoming a sister or a nun is quite a long one. They spend years studying and praying about their vocation before they take their final vows. When you make hasty judgments or ask thoughtless questions please keep in mind that we do understand the magnitude of our decision. If you don’t understand then just say that instead of putting your foot in your mouth. Just like anyone who is in a new relationship, we won’t pass up the chance to explain to you why we made the decision to become a sister and help you better understand what it all means. Most importantly remember that more than anything we need your prayers and that we’ll be praying for you too!
*Just a couple shameless plugs for my Sisters:
The Sisters of Mary just made their first CD! You can go here: https://www.sistersofmary.org/mater-eucharistiae-info.html to listen to a couple clips and to pre-order the CD. It’s A-mazing.
Their next discernment retreat is Nov 9-10 in Ann Arbor, Michigan. All single women 16-35 are invited. You should come! I’ll be there too! Retreat Flyer: https://www.sistersofmary.org/images/retreat_flyer_2013-14.pdf
Katie Ploch is the second oldest of seven children, in a crazy and loud Italian family. She grew up in the country where she developed a love for the great outdoors, which comes second after her love of Christ and the Catholic faith. She received degrees in Theology and Catechetics from Franciscan University, where she is currently in the process of earning her Masters of Theology and Christian Ministry, through their Distance Learning Program. She spent three wonderful years in Colorado and is hopelessly lost without the mountains to show her which way west is. Currently she is the Director of Child and Youth Ministry at a couple of small parishes in Southeastern Wisconsin, but in August 2014, God willing, she will be entering the Dominican Sisters of Mary, Mother of the Eucharist as a postulant.
