"The LORD is close to the brokenhearted, saves those whose spirit is crushed." - Psalm 34:19
The
baby youngest toddler (what?!) has been especially fussy lately. I'd chalk it up to teething but I've been saying that since she was five and a half months old and here we are at 13 months with no teeth to show, so who knows. In any event, she's been particularly clingy. She's happy as a clam to be held, but when she's in one of
those moods it is best not to set her down. Setting her on the floor, even surrounded by her favorite toys, leads to a complete meltdown. Instant sobs. In .000001 seconds she can go from smiles to the saddest face her big brown eyes can make as she looks up with this expression of "why on earth would you put me down? Don't you love me? Can't you just keep holding me?"
As is typical, her reaction makes me think of how I am with the Father. I'm perfectly content to sit with Him, to snuggle up to Him, to be by His side. He sets me down or gives me a task and tries to send me out in the world and I melt.
Why would you do that to me, Lord? Why can't I just stay with You? Don't you love me enough to let me just stay? He sends us out precisely
because He loves us. He nurtures us and gives us what we need to thrive, to learn, to experience, to grow.
When I set the little one down, it isn't because I don't love her. Sometimes it is because my arm is gosh darn tired, but mostly it is because I want her to learn, to grow, to experience life beyond the view she gets on my hip. I surround her with toys she loves, people she loves, and a home to thrive in. Even though I'm not holding her, I'm never far away.
One such time I set her down, gave her toys and walked away just a few feet - still well within her sight. She sat there, tears welling up in her eyes, just staring at me as she started to sob. I crouched down and said, "come here, sweetheart" and motioned her over. Though the journey wasn't far - even by her standards {she's a
fast crawler!} - she continued to weep, flopping forward on the floor, overwhelmed by the fact that she wasn't on my hip anymore. My heart was moved as hers broke and I closed the gap. She couldn't move, so I went to her, the same way the Father moves to us. He is never far from us, always waiting for us to come to Him, to call on Him, to ask for His help. But then, in those moments of utter heartbreak He comes close. He bridges the gap, He rushes in to put our heart back together and to save our crushed spirit.
The time will come, as it always does, to be sent out once again, but what a glorious comfort it is that the Father comes for us when life overwhelms us. He sends us into the world out of love for us, but that same love He has for us means that He's never far, ready to comfort and console us like a baby in the arms of her mother.
