when it doesn’t feel like a Baby.

I’m not sure when I actually felt pregnant. I took the at-home test, took the pictures of it, told my husband and…it didn’t feel real.

We told our parents and our closest friends – they rejoiced, we rejoiced…and it didn’t feel real.

I called the doctor and started taking pre-natal vitamins. We scheduled our first pre-natal appointment and, surprise surprise, it didn’t feel real.

It didn’t feel real when I peed in a cup at the doctor’s office, when they took three vials of blood, or when they sat me down to talk about various pregnancy things. Continue reading

the spiritual side of Pregnancy.

I promise that not every single post for the next however many months I’ve got left will be about pregnancy. I promise. Y’all know I write about what’s on my heart and where God puts me, and for right now, that’s smack dab in the middle of pregnancy.

I’d like to think that I was pretty well prepared, or at least well aware of the physical things that can (and do) happen during pregnancy. You know the normal list, morning sickness, sore ta-tas, exhaustion, irritability, frequent urination, mood swings (think PMS on steroids). Of course there have been a few symptoms I didn’t expect such as excessive saliva (that’s a thing? A pregnancy thing? Yes. And it is weird.). Women often talk about the physical side, even the emotional side of pregnancy. Some women are over the moon about being pregnant and others hate it. Some love it after the first trimester, others would sooner have the baby arrive via stork. What almost no one talks about is the spiritual side of pregnancy. Continue reading

helping hands and Paws.

“If we want to live a life of love of God, we must not fail in our love towards our neighbor.” -St. Therese of Lisieux

I’m convinced that when people give out of love, great things happen. When lots of people give out of love, lives are changed. I have an opportunity to share with you, to give a little to make a huge difference and change a little boy’s life. (What you find in this post is from my dear friend Gina, who shared Jen and Cameron’s story with me – these words are not my own, but the desire to share and help out is something I simply couldn’t turn my back on.) Continue reading

shaming Pregnancy.

just dont say it pregnancy{Consider this a revised edition of “just don’t say it: Pregnancy” written by yours truly – at least for the early stages of pregnancy!}

I knew that less than charitable comments about pregnancy were possible. The vast majority of my friends have children, so I can’t say I’m totally surprised by some of things that people have said to me since we announced that we are pregnant and yet…I am. So now I give you the top ways to shame a pregnancy (even the very first one!) and/or ensure that next time around you won’t be told until, say, after the baby is born. (A few of these can be said in a charitable way, but often times the tone implies something less charitable.) Continue reading

it isn’t Mine.

There is a tendency in ministry to talk about what we do as “ours” or “mine”. I’ve fallen into that trap more times than I can count. My ministry is growing or my program has seen much change and improvement. Wrong. This ministry I’m blessed to work with isn’t mine. It is God’s – He just lets me be His hands and feet.

It really is a pride thing, or so I’ve found, when we start claiming things as our own. Has the ministry grown under my direction? Perhaps, but that doesn’t make it mine. God willed it to be so and could just as easily let me fail to teach me a different kind of lesson.  When I start claiming the ministry as my own, dangerous things can happen. I start thinking that the success or failure of it relies solely on me and my abilities. When that starts to happen, I lose focus and the ministry fails. It is a danger we all face – those in ministry, but everyone really – the danger of thinking we have complete control over everything, or anything for that matter. Continue reading

on relating to Mary.

I know. I write about Mary a lot. So what? She’s fabulous, so I’m going to keep writing about her because I’m Catholic, I’m a woman, and its what I do. Cool? Cool.

One night pregnancy hormones got the best of me. (Okay, okay, that’s happened more than once, but for the sake of this story, let’s just pretend it was only one night, alright?) I was crying sobbing hysterically for the umpteenth time that night. I thought that Anthony believed I was going to be a bad mother. I felt abandoned and left alone by the man who I hoped would love and support me. Hormones, right? They’re awesome. Of course he said nor meant any of that, but that’s exactly what I heard: you’re already a bad mom and I don’t support you. Continue reading

what marriage is teaching Me {vol. 2}

what marriage is teaching me link upEek! A new link up! I’m beyond excited to host and even more excited to read about what marriage is teaching others! The easiest way to link-up is to put the link to your individual post in a comment at the end of this post. Then hop around and see what others are learning and writing about! I’ll host this link up on the last Thursday of every month (like a monthly Thanksgiving – literally!), so be sure to come back and keep writing – marriage is always teaching new lessons! Continue reading