I write about this ache a lot and I probably talk about it quite a bit more. I’m hungry. Its not so much a physical hunger as an emotional hunger, a soul hunger. I’m hungry for a man.
I don’t want to sit here and whine about a topic which, lately, feels a lot like beating a dead horse. I have Jesus. He is the Man I truly seek, when I’m being honest with myself. But while I have Jesus, I also hunger for a man, for my love, for my soulmate. Call him whatever I like, I hunger for him, I long for him. Some might say that’s pathetic, but I don’t think so. God has truly written this desire on my heart and anytime I stray from it, He leads me back. I feel called to married life and sometimes I think, maybe religious life is really for me. That thought doesn’t last long before the good Lord puts something in my path, in my life or on my heart that reminds me of His calling for my life, for my vocation.
So I’m left with one question: WHERE IS HE?
He’s somewhere, I know that. He’s out there, though I have no idea where. I think I’m left in this hungering place because so often lately I’m disappointed. I mean no hard feelings to the guys in my life because there are some really great ones…but where are the men? Time and time again my female friends and I talk about the guys in our life, the boys in our life, but we don’t talk about the men. We wonder where they are and why they aren’t around. I know there are men, they exist…they just all seem to be married already or becoming a priest. Which is awesome…and yet we are still hungering.
Its hard to describe what a real man looks like, they are rare and beautiful to see. Men are not the same as guys or boys. I use the word “man” so sparingly it almost feels like its a word from a foreign language.
boy (noun) – a male who lacks maturity, judgment, experience, etc.
man (noun) – the dictionary fails. It says, “an adult male person, as distinguished from a boy”…though it fails to define qualities that make that “distinguished” clear.
man (verb) – to strengthen, fortify, or brace. …better.
A man stands up, a man pursues a woman he is interested in, he is honest with her. A man is the same person around all people, he doesn’t act one way around a woman he likes and another way around his guy friends, his core values and principles are set and define who he is and what he believes. A man imitates Jesus. While the Bible doesn’t say much (or really, anything) about Jesus in the romance department, I’m going to guess a few things about Jesus as a man in the romantic sense:
He didn’t flip flop about a woman he was interested in.
He wouldn’t compromise her purity of heart, mind, body or soul. He wouldn’t put her in situations to test her purity.
He would guard her heart (this would include being honest with her from early on about any romantic feelings, or lack thereof, and where he [as the MAN] saw the relationship going).
He would offer His strength as a man, leading and guiding their relationship (friendship or romantic), both emotionally and spiritually.
So what does this all boil down to? Guys, boys, dudes, you have the PERFECT example of what it means to be a man in Jesus. We know you aren’t perfect, you aren’t also fully divine, we know you will fail from time to time, you will sin. But guess what? Jesus fell three times on the road to Golgotha and every single time He got back up, He kept walking because LOVE was His motivation, His reason for being, His reason to keep pursuing His bride, the Church. Look to Jesus.
MAN UP, IMITATE JESUS.